Character Bios of The Misanthrope

        The cast members have written descriptive limericks about their characters. Our actors' production roles are also listed next to their names.
Alceste (Julia Heynen, Hair and Makeup Design)

I'm intent to uncomfortable ends,
I alienate all of my friends,
I try to make plans,
But can't understand,
The signals my hot girlfriend sends.

Philinte (Robin Lutz, Assistant Director)

I'm constantly offering aide
On a misanthrope's moral crusade.
A nice charming sir
I'm dubbed "raisoneur"
But reason just won't get me laid!


Oronte (Melissa Tillery, Publicity and Webmaster)

Oronte is a fabulous poet,
Who thinks that the whole world should know it,
If you don't like his work,
Then don't act like a jerk,
'Cause he'll ruin your life if you show it.

Célimène (Sarah Heiderman, Co-Sound Designer)

There once was a girl from France,
Who let everyone into her pants.
But sex can be messy,
Some bitch said 'God-blessy'
And her lovers just scattered like ants

Basque (Amanda Parker, Costumes)

Basque seems like a shy little maid,
When really she wants to get laid.
She dusts and she sweeps,
when she's happy she leaps,
Just hoping that she will get paid.

Eliante (Kellie Mecleary, Movement and Dramaturgy)

Young Eliante uses her head,
She's sweet and attentive, well read,
She'll listen real good,
Do just what she should,
But she's ever so lonely in bed.

Acaste (Emily Cunningham, Publicity and Program Design)

I think I'm the god of all men,
With horse or with sword or with pen,
My friends call me small,
But with girls, I get all,
Except with that chick Celimene.


Clitandre (Eryn London, Asst. Set Designer, and Dov Liverman, Sound Designer)

There once was a fop named Clitandre,
All he said was a double entendre,
Pinky so high,
It reached up to the sky,
And never had to pay for his laundre.


Guards (Darron Bruce, Documentarian, and Dov Liverman, Sound Designer)

There once was a sinister driver.
He brought news to Alceste that was dire.
A patch on one eye,
Shouldn't mess with this guy,
Or he'll pull out your teeth with some pliers.

Arsinoé (Colleen Desrosiers, Props Master)

This woman some think is the meanest,
But she thinks she is the keenest,
She hates when people are bawdy,
Which makes her quite haughty,
Maybe she just needs a good conquest.

Dubois (Allison Ramer, Lighting Design)

Dubois was his master's man
Who had to come up with a plan.
He went to Alceste,
As he thought best,
To tell him their hides were tanned.